When I Say I'm a Christian

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I am saved"
I'm whispering "I get lost!"
"That is why I chose this way."

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need someone to be my guide.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
and pray for strength to carry on.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
and cannot ever pay the debt.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
my flaws are too visible
but God believes I'm worth it.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain
I have my share of heartaches
which is why I seek His name.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I do not wish to judge.
I have no authority.
I only know I'm loved.

-Author Carol Wimmer - Copyright 1988

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So, I've been cleaning my room since I got back from Glenville. Before I put everything back in my room, I had to clean out a lot of junk. I was going through old files, old boxes, and other old dusty things, and I came across this poem. The first time I read it was about 3-4 years ago. I loved it. I wrote about it then, somewhere, but I don't know where.

If you're reading this, you obviously want to know what I mean when I say, "I am a Christian." I'm going to tell you. I'm going to lay it all out plainly, get ready, I'm going to use bold words and italics! ;)

God made everything. (people, dinosaurs, e.coli, roses, black bears, etc.)
God gave the first two humans free reign of their beautiful garden, but told them that they could not eat the tree of knowledge of good and evil's fruit. But they screwed up.
Because they sinned, God cursed men and women. Adam never had to work before, but now he and his decendents had to do physical labor. Women were going to experience pain in childbirth, and now everything was corrupt. From that point on, bad things happened.
I am a sinner. I am born with a sinful nature, just like I'm born with a nature to try to make people laugh. It's inborn, and that's why its so hard to change it. That’s why I still sin.
God is Holy. Being Holy means to be set apart. You can't contaminate Holy.
Sinners cannot be with a Holy God unless they've been identified with Jesus Christ.
God wants us to be with Him. So He did something so shocking that most people consider it a fairy-tale. God sacrificed His son, Jesus. S-A-C-R-I-F-I-C-E.
Once I finally realized what that meant, I asked Jesus to forgive me.
When Jesus Christ forgave my sin He covered me in His righteousness. He took off my dirty clothes and wrapped me in His own robe. Now when God sees me, he sees His Son.
I am going to HEAVEN!! That is so good.
Just like the poem says, I still mess up. I still fall down. Trust me, I fall down. I get so discouraged. I'm a Christian so that I can call on my Savior to help me get back up when I make mistakes.
God only asks that I admit my mistakes and ask Him to forgive me again, and let Him help me.
God gives me the Holy Spirit to help me realize when I’ve made mistakes and when I need to ask forgiveness. If you’re a Christian, and you’ve sinned, and you feel that terrible burdening guilt in your heart, I believe that is the Holy Spirit tugging at your heart strings, trying to get your attention.
I don't have all the right answers. I don't have a perfect life, and I certainly don't claim to be better than anyone else. But as a Christian, I can climb onto God's shoulders and let Him carry me through the issues of life.
When I call myself a Christian, I'm expected to live like one. So, when I make promises to God--I keep them.
I go to church because I want to be there! Not because I'm supposed to be there. I go to church to be around other Christians, to get uplifted and encouraged. I go because God wants so desperately to have a relationship with me.
Since He wants a relationship with me, I talk to Him. I read my Bible to hear what He has to say in response to my questions or in response to the fits that I throw. (This is a side note: A lot of times I pray when I go driving. I talk out-loud and I probably look like a crazy woman)
You can't have a relationship with your mom if you don't know who she is. You can't have a relationship with your boyfriend if you don't spend time with him.
Army wives write letters to their soldiers, and they earnestly await a reply. She can not wait to hear what the love of her life has to say to her. And she's not going to throw that letter away. She's going to read it over and over again. She'll analyze it, and cry over it. That's intimacy when you can't be close to each other physically.
God wants me to be that close to His heart. He wants me to want to be that close to His heart.
He wants everyone else to be close to His heart, too, so He has commanded me to tell other people about what He did for me. I'm supposed to introduce people to Jesus, after I make the introduction He can take it from there. He doesn't need my help.
Being a Christian isn't about being better than you. I never claimed to be better than anyone. If anything, I have an inferiority complex. I'm letting Him work with me on that.
God wants me to be happy, but sometimes life isn't always happy.
People always tell me that a God that loves everyone wouldn't let bad things happen. Bad things happen because we are a cursed world. We are a cursed world because of the mistake that Adam and Eve made. God doesn't make bad things happen to people, but he does let them happen. The purpose of the bad things is always to make us appreciate the good things, and maybe by appreciating the good things, we'll grow closer to Him. God doesn't let India starve because He's a cruel God. India starves because of the curse. God doesn't sit back and watch, and laugh. He does not turn His back. This is hard to understand, and that's where my faith comes into play. I do not understand it, but I trust in it, and I believe it.
We have a sinful nature. God has a holy nature. It is the way He is. He cannot associate with sin because He is so Holy. Oil and water is the best way I can describe it.
He can't associate with us until we ask forgiveness, and He anxiously waits for us to turn to Him and ask Him to pull us out of the mess we're in.
Bad things still happen because of the curse, and God won't undo that. I don't like that, but I still believe God is Holy and Perfect. I don't want people to die and go to Hell. That's why I need to tell people about Jesus. The argument about predestination is a tricky one. God doesn't choose who goes to Hell, but He knows who is going to. That is what I believe. I believe that God gives us a will to do what we want. Some people will hear about Jesus, reject him, and go to Hell. Some people will never hear about Jesus, and they will also go to Hell. I don't like that much at all! But who am I to tell God what to do?? I believe that the curse has damned everyone to Hell, but God still gives us a chance to get out of that mess. I believe that He is so HOLY and we are so UNWORTHY, that we should be flat on our faces thanking Him for the opportunity that he has given US! We are fortunate.
People are still going to ask me "why does God let people go to Hell" and I'll hold to what I've always said. We are cursed.
If there is anything that is underpreached in the world, it is God's Holiness, and the Curse.
We'll never understand it.
You can ask me whatever you want. I can't tell you why God's mind is made up in a certain way, though. I can only tell you what I know about the Bible. I don't know the mind of God.

I've gotten a little off topic, but I don't care. This is Christianity. The good, the bad, and the ugly.
If you've read this and its ruffled your feathers a little, I can certainly see why, BUT.... if you don't think its true, then why does it bother you? If you think its all a hoax let it all alone and don't worry about it. But God says that the gospel will offend a lot of people. Its not what we want to hear. If you think I'm an idiot for being so bold. Fine. I don't care. I think that if it bothers you that much, you should ask yourself why it bothers you so much.
I know I'm going to have some angry people.... I have no idea who this is going to offend, but its bound to bother someone.

I'm back on topic a little. When I say I'm a Christian, I'm not saying I am every other Christian in the world. A lot of Christians are intolerant an unaccepting, but I try to live my life so that I’m not put into that category. God wants everyone, so I don't target specific people. When I say "I am a Christian", I'm not saying it for the rest of the Christian population. I'm saying it for myself. I am going to serve God as best I can, and I'm not going to worry about everyone else.
When I say I'm a Christian, I'm putting myself in a situation where everyone expects more of me. People who don't believe in God want to see Christians mess up. But as a human I am not perfect, and I will make mistakes. I'm going to try really hard not to, but I will.
When I say I’m a Christian, I’d better know what I’m talking about. But if I don’t have an answer, it’s because I haven’t memorized the Bible. I know a lot of verses, but I’m not always ready for a pop quiz. This is a learning thing for me. I learn something everyday.
I try not to make mistakes because it paints an Ugly picture of God.
God is love.
God is beautiful. He is everything that is right and pure.

I love God.

When I say I'm a Christian, I just want everyone to know what that means. And if you have any questions about something I said, ask.

When I say I am a Christian, I feel so blessed to be called a child of God. I am so very happy to be going to Heaven. I’m so thankful for all of my Christian friends, I’m so glad you’re going there with me. It wouldn’t be right without you.